2023 posts:

9-13-2023

FOR MOTHER:

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I wrote the song "Mother" and a few others during my mom's time before her death after getting cancer. It was the second hardest death I have gone through but I was lucky enough to be there when it happened as she took her last breath. She is no longer in pain and she wanted to not fight her cancer being at stage 4 which I would have felt the exact same way as we respected her wishes. She was one of the closest people I had in my life and even though we had our very different lifestyles and we could never understand each other on many levels we respected each other unlike my father who left me several decades ago. My mother was one of the strongest woman I knew and to see her so weak and gone those last few days broke my heart but again I believe she is where she wants to be. I am glad for her as I struggle with my thoughts on that I made it my goal to be a more giving person, not be so selfish, and although I have always loved Jesus I never liked his father but for her I have decided that maybe he got me there on time to see her pass on that maybe he I am wrong about him? I am not sure what I consider myself or why she of all people had to suffer I know that for her I will open up more to him...

 

 

 

JP Vanir of Vampyrian616

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dark sisters come with me tonight
join the circle
far from the blinding light
feel the beat
and dance in mother moons delight
call on the earth tonight
isis, astarte, diana, hecate, demeter, kali, innanna
come to me come to me in the full moons light

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2021 posts:

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(May 09 2021)

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Autistic depressive manic Mothers Day

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This was a very bad Mother's Day for me; I realized I cannot go out to gatherings with the family much but yet I still try and today I ruined both my mom and my sisters Mother's Day. Sometimes I wonder why the Gods keep me going the few times I tried to take the cowards way out or got in a life or situation which happened too often. I swear I often wonder why I was even born when all my dad and mom's kids at first did not survive except but I guess that's why I am all messed up because she is way to bipolar and my dad is way to depressive and OCD so I am nothing but a mess who can't do normal family things...

 

I guess I am better off staying home because all my comfort zones are no more...

 

News: National Native Americans month AKA Original Americans Month

11/01/20 from: https://tinyurl.com/y3awghmk

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 November is Native American Heritage Month. While there are many events celebrating Native Americans, the potentially most impactful and far-reaching was an NPR report this morning stating “that dozens of House Democrats sent a letter to Biden’s transition team endorsing New Mexico Rep. Deb Haaland for interior secretary.”

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Haaland is a member of the Pueblo of Laguna and Jemez Tribes and won re-election along with Rep. Sharice Davids, Ho-Chunk Tribe, Reps. Tom Cole, Chickasaw Tribe, and Markwayne Mullin, Cherokee of the Western Band. Two of the six tribal members to serve in the U.S. Congress. Yvette Herrell, Cherokee, in New Mexico, and Native Hawaiian Kaiali’i “Kai” Kahele,  also won their bids bringing the total of Indigenous people serving in the U.S. Congress to six.

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To have Haaland named as Secretary of the Interior could allow for Indigenous peoples to have a larger voice within the federal government than ever before. The Indigenous Environmental Network sent a letter to the Biden transition team endorsing Haaland that was undersigned by over two dozen organizations. Haaland and Sharice Davids were first elected in 2018, becoming the first Native American women to serve in the U.S. Congress.

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“We are here for the people and all of the heartache and all of the horrible federal eras of federal Indian policy that happened through the centuries,” Haaland said. “We’re here to try to make a little dent in making those things right and moving us into a new era in our country where we say everyone’s voice matters.” Another notable event was the announcement by the Library of Congress last week that they had appointed Joy Harjo of Muscokee (Creek) Nation to serve a third term as U.S. Poet Laureate. Harjo is only the second laureate to see her term extended since the position was established in 1943, and will allow her to complete works whose timeline has been impacted by the pandemic.

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In a statement released by Librarian of Congress Carla Hayden, “Throughout the pandemic, Joy Harjo has shown how poetry can help steady us and nurture us. I am thankful she is willing to continue this work on behalf of the country. A third term will give Joy the opportunity to develop and extend her signature project.” Harjo’s work which focuses on her signature project, “Living Nations, Living Words,” which was launched as part of the Native American Heritage Month celebration in November, and “features an interactive ArcGIS story map, which maps 47 contemporary Native American poets across the country — including Harjo, Louise Erdrich, Natalie Diaz, Ray Young Bear, Craig Santos Perez, Sherwin Bitsui and Layli Long Soldier.”

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Other Native American Heritage Month news:

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• The Smithsonian’s National Museum of the American Indian is offering free online access to its Native Cinema Showcase to celebrate its 20th anniversary, which runs from November 18 – 27 and offers various programming available for online viewing. The program highlights and celebrates the works of “Native filmmakers and stories from Indigenous communities throughout the Western Hemisphere and the Arctic.”

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• The contributions of local Native American artists in Fort Lauderdale, Florida is being celebrated with the mixed media fine art exhibit titled “Circle of Unity” on display in the New River Inn building of History Fort Lauderdale. The exhibit is described as being “intergenerational, and multi-disciplinary” that “presents a contemporary perspective of Seminole artists on the cycles of solidarity and patterns of resilience that have always existed within the histories of the Seminole and Miccosukee People of Florida.” In a statement released by the Fort Lauderdale Historical Society, executive director Patricia Zeiler said, “It is an honor and a privilege to host ‘Circle of Unity’ in the very spot that the original people of the land we now know as Fort Lauderdale helped build and cultivate. We are grateful to the Native American artists for sharing their tradition, culture and vision with the community and to the Seminole Tribe of Florida, Inc. for its unwavering support of History Fort Lauderdale during Native American Heritage Month.”​

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• Documentary filmmaker Tsanavi Spoonhunter of the Northern Arapaho Tribe is using her skills to shift the way Native peoples are portrayed, and also highlight some of the modern issues that Native tribal members face. “What I would want people to understand is that the issues that we face are modern issues that are real and that are happening in the backyard of America,” Spoonhunter said in an interview with Nevada Today. Her documentary film, “Crow Country: Our Right to Food Sovereignty” focuses on the Crow tribal members and their struggles to be food secure despite high levels of unemployment and the closure of the only grocery store on reservation land. Spoonhunter first became interested in the Crow through the Supreme Court case of Herrera v. Wyoming while working on her master’s degree at the Graduate School of Journalism at the University of California, Berkeley. That case centered on the rights of Crow tribal members of Montana to hunt on unoccupied land in Wyoming from a prior treaty which the Supreme Court upheld. “Crow Country” won Best Documentary Short at the American Indian Film Institute’s 45th annual American Indian Film Festival this fall. “The imagery that you’re used to seeing and consuming in media and film is inaccurate,” Spoonhunter said. “A lot of people don’t realize Native people are modern people with modern issues, but we still have that connection to our historic culture.”

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• The American Indian Alaska Native Tourism Association named American Indian Alaska Native Tourism Association as the recipient of its ‘Best Cultural Heritage Experience’ award in September for the Arizona Indian Festival which offers traditional dancing and performances, opportunities to observe native artisans working their crafts like weaving and pottery, as well as arts & crafts for sale, and native foods. The annual event is free and family friendly.

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Trans VS Fem?

 

7/20/2020

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I am not sure if I can call myself a feminist anymore after watching "Transparent" on Amazon Prime esp the end of the second season - seeing how Trans people often are not excepted even in the feminist community because they where born with a penis whether they wanted it or not! They are often not allowed at a feminist festival (although a feminist as well) because they may still have that penis (whether they want it or not) because the other woman there may be traumatized by it and feel like they may be raped (like I want this thing that gives you your issues)? I think they should go to therapy for that one? I am trying to be mean but everyone just seems to be too into what someone has or doesn't have whether they chose it or not. All the other women lucky enough to be born as such got to run around free with their shirts off and such like look at me proud born woman; BUT I don't like being w/o a shirt in public as I am...

 

I am still not 100% sure about myself and what I am but getting that removed (so I have heard) you will no longer get an orgasm except maybe by having your prostate massaged or what have you and though that does really make it better both ways I am not into men at all. Fem guys and flamers I sometimes can get along with unfortunately most of the homosexual men I met are often too into how you look and such. I never knew there were such issues even in another community I used to respect until I saw this show; that could be so hateful of certain people because they had the wrong genitals whether they want them or not. I do not know what to do too often when stuff like this comes up after realizing sometimes something you are again often conflicts yet again with I most likely am or already know I am...

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Complications of Life 06/27/2020

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I really try to understand everything lately but it always seems impossible? Lately: (I feel like the above photo it seems and my motivation is gone too often)

 

A. I lost my job during the epidemic and then there store shut down so I am out of work and its impossible for me to get one now as I have not worked in well over a decade before my last job but my apartment cost so much I am barely making it so how is someone on disability because he is technically not able to work with others supposed to survive with out a job in this economy when what they give me is never enough for my needs? I also don’t know how the 1,200 is supposed to make up for all the lost pay because of it when many of us still don,t have jobs? Still now I know the country will always be in debt as people keep complaining about taxing when there is never enough money to pay for this countries bills...

 

B. I do everything I myself can for my oldest fur-baby why is technically not a baby anymore but we got a new actual baby fur-baby a couple months ago and he scares the shit out of poor Marius as well as even though they are both males (big mistake) he molested his before and we have to protect him. I do the best to love both the cats but Marius has become so mean because of him but I want him to feel safe. The other kitten is a sweetheart and is so easy to love often more so then my original baby because of all the times he feels like he is being replaced. Both of them seem to love Amanda Hernandez more then me it seems and the only fur-babies that where daddies boys Harley (who had to go to another place as you are only allowed 2 cats at apartments anymore if at all as they dont see them as children) and my first fur-baby Set who passed. I miss them everyday and will never forgive my self for Harley when Lily’s original mother took her back anyways when she had a place to live. I need a real therapy animal as mine is now driving me crazy because of everything...

 

C. I continue to keep having issues with the “Vampire community” how many of them perceive the Vampyran TempleUVUP as a cult like Temple of the Vampire as we are both Temples and they do not want to see Vampyrism as a spiritual condition as well as a physical one. The originally where trying to get me in trouble as a plagiarist who steals copyrighted information as his own; I am a theologian as well as a vampirologist and share information I learn online/books/ect. with the members on the V-TUVUP site to educate the Vampire community on its abilities, capabilities, beginnings as well as focus on the spirituality of Vampyrism. I never claimed to write everything written and always put credit where credit is due (to the original author and original site).

Now I have been having issues because I have Asperger’s (just recently found out as I was diagnosed with Autism and never received help with this early) I struggled in school quite a bit as falsely diagnosed with just ADHD and was never able to go to college because of this as well as because we were poor. I get shit on all the time because of my grammar and how I communicate online BUT I struggle with this shit constantly and it torments me to no end. I did write a couple books though the first one was just the basic principles for the second book but in the past they went on and on about the grimmer and mistakes I made writing it (though on the second book I did have some help from our previous Spiritual Mother Samantha Adams and now for some time I have been struggling with writers block. I honestly am not sure I will ever be able to write another book again as it is so very difficult for someone with my conditions to explain everything the proper way and people have issues understanding me. Other Vampyres in the VC just like any other community I am sure also struggle with this so I decided to make groups for us:

 

1. https://www.facebook.com/groups/dark.aspies/

2. https://darkdruidgoth.wixsite.com/vpg-alliance/group/dark-aspies/discussion

3. https://v-templeuvup.spruz.net/Coven/DarkAspies

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One Vamp Druids Burden APRIL 11, 2020

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Natures beauty often wants to taunt me...

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The sun he makes me tired and drains me...

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The moon however she energizes me...

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The flowers, plants, and animals make it hard to breathe sometimes...

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It can often be too difficult to enjoy the things I love and care about...

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But yet I suffer anyways for them despite it all...

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and most will never understand or even care...

 

 

© Rev. JP DDG (Dark Druid Goth)

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Intersex, trans or what? APRIL 10, 2020

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I always wondered what all of the many terms that make of LGBTQ and don’t forget I as I just found out Intersex the new word for what used to be hermaphrodite. There are about 1 in 2000 live births per year that are partially some what or very intersex? Most however do not even know or not seen as such. So one must wonder is that what a transgender person is? Some perhaps but I am sure not all so then ho does one really know what they are anymore? I love learning such things that makes me feel not so odd...

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2020 time to get back on track and stop worrying 02/01/2020

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I must warn you I have a hard time explaining myself as I am Autistic so please I hope my words don't confuse you as most regular peoples words often confuse me. Anyways I was reading a pagan blog online and I realized I need to stop getting distracted from my spiritual practice. I was struggling for a long time staying motivated to keep up on the TempleUVUP as it has lost its flare and feel like one of the only members keeping the site going but it has been rough as I have had trouble writing for the longest time. It is hard enough for someone like me with my disabilities, lack in money, and being constantly busy to stay motivated when I have constantly struggled with my moods/depression. I want to keep up on praying, keeping up with my rituals, and communicating with the Gods but its hard when you start doubting everything because things get so bad you want to give up...

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I have been a member of CUUPS for a long time but was lucky enough to find a Unitarian Universalist congregation in Delaware, Ohio that made me actually want to join a “church” again though they use the term fellowship for the same reason I would lol. They unlike my family or other churches except me for the way I am or have felt comfortable revealing to them anyways. I thought I would never go to church again but I realized church is good for people sometimes because it makes us feel connected where someone like me feels disconnected from the world and that I will never fit in. However they except me and I hope one day I can not be worried about not worried about what anyone thinks.​ I normally do not feel like I fit in anywhere: in my city, with my family, as well as in my communities (vampire, pagan, and goth) ​but I feel comfortable there​ and actually look forward to going even though it is really early in the morning lol. I am like no one in my city and most misjudge as they don't understand me; my family also does not understand me and will often not meet me half way with my life choices (as DUUF does). Vampires often do not want me to believe what we are is a spiritual condition so my house is despised for my personal belief, Goths often despise me because I drink blood and make them look bad, pagans often despise me because I need energy from others to not constantly be sick and fatigue. So I feel all alone in every community even my local fellowship I am too afraid to let them find out as I am sure they could never understand...

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I try to read and meditate but with focus and reading issues it has been harder than it used to be but I am not sure why it was sometimes easier in the past but no longer is the case depending on the book? One thing I know is to many books make it too easy to go off track and use words that I am not sure about seeing as I never went to college and that really makes it hard to want to go on and deal with my stupidity. I used to have the patience and not these things bother me but I can't help the way I feel that it is too difficult for someone like me as it too me too long and was too hard to get the help I needed and yet I am still struggling. I have been working a new job that tires me out and it has been hard to keep on things out of my daily routine I must do in order to relax but relation never seems to come for someone like me so I have not been able to find the time to do what I must do to and do not have time for my spiritual practices, research, and reading. I most certainly need to get back to praying to my spiritual mother for help getting back to my rituals, my reading, writing, and more on my the site and research ect. Now that I found some people to talk to, made a breakthrough in counseling, got some help with my disabilities, and am better with my communication as well as my moods to a point (at least while keeping busy at work) I am hopping things will continue to move forward. This seems even more likely now that I have finally got rid of the writers block I have had for too many years...

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© Rev. JP Vanir the Dark Druid Goth

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My Original post where I first wrote this: 

https://tinyurl.com/y39bmacl

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2019 posts:

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My holidays with the wife's family 12/29/2019

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I went to Bowling Greens to see my step Son Maven after so many long years of missing him​ for Xmas. The first bus ride I did OK with but the crowd was a bit much at the station luckily I got to sit by my wife on the bus so it wasn't too bad. Her poor mom got lost in the fog and we felt really bad about that and I was worried cause Jay was there for the holidays but he was quiet in the car BUT as soon as we got to her moms house he was hyper as hell being as this was all new to him (being severely autistic). I was worried how he would react to me but after a while he seemed do like me pretty well which is odd for him and he even cooed at me Amanda told me which was cute. I was amazed as well the they actually had diet code red at the circle K in Bowling Greens which I have not seen in so many years but I was good and didn't drink pop...

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Shakers are still alive and there beliefs surprised even me 11/10/2019 

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On November 10th 2019 I went to the fellowship I am now a member of DUUF and my good friend and Mentor Coe Huckabee, who had the privilege to visit the so called “last” Shaker village, taught us all about there beliefs and practices. Unfortunately however at this service I could not sit with my own wife Amanda Hernandez as for this service as was done in Shaker style except my favorite part DANCING! I wanted to share the seven interesting things I learned below:

 

1.***They believe God is all encompassing or female as well as male not just Father God only...

 

2. ***They believe woman and men where equal as all races where also equal which was they first in those times...

 

3. They where all about herbs and selling them as old fashion (witch like) brooms. A friend of mine and one taught me of them at DUUF got one at the last known shaker village in Main that is rainbow colored lol...

 

4. They where complete pacifists...

 

5. ***The shaker name came from the way they worshiped God ecstatically by dancing!

 

6. They believe Mother Ann Lee the founder of the there community (originally called “United Society of Believers in Christ's Second Appearing”) was the second coming of Jesus Christ...

 

7. Woman and Men where completely separate in all ways and they cannot even have children so they must adopt to keep there religion/communities alive the few that are left which comes to our last point:

 

Despite the rumors and wikipedia the Sabbathday Lake Shaker Village is NOT the last and only shaker village in the US. There is even said to be one in Delaware county in Ohio surprisingly as there is truly never the last of anything anymore...

 

I hope you enjoyed learning that as much as I did...

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Rev JP Vanir the Dark Druid Goth

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Plastic Pollution 07/21/2019

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Plastic is the worst type of pollutant and chemical shit which should be eliminated at all costs – The fake plastic beautiful people is the worst type of brainwashing on the world...

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Plastic = Beautiful and Fake...

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© JP Vanir the  Dark Druid Goth

 

THE FACTS:

 

Plastic never goes away.

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Plastic is a durable material made to last forever, yet 33 percent of it is used once and then discarded. Plastic cannot biodegrade; it breaks down into smaller and smaller pieces.

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Plastic spoils our groundwater.

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There are tens of thousands of landfills across the globe. Buried beneath each one of them, plastic leachate full of toxic chemicals is seeping into groundwater and flowing downstream into lakes and rivers.

Plastic attracts other pollutants.

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Manufacturers' additives in plastics, like flame retardants, BPAs and PVCs, can leach their own toxins. These oily poisons repel water and stick to petroleum-based objects like plastic debris.

Plastic threatens wildlife.

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Entanglement, ingestion and habitat disruption all result from plastic ending up in the spaces where animals live. In our oceans alone, plastic debris outweighs zooplankton by a ratio of 36-to-1.

Plastic piles up in the environment.

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Americans alone discard more than 30 million tons of plastic a year; only 8 percent of it gets recycled. The rest ends up in landfills or becomes 'litter', and a small portion is incinerated.

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Plastic poisons our food chain.

 

Even plankton, the tiniest creatures in our oceans, are eating microplastics and absorbing their toxins. The substance displaces nutritive algae that creatures up the food chain require.

 

Plastic affects human health.

 

Chemicals leached by plastics are in the blood and tissue of nearly all of us. Exposure to them is linked to cancers, birth defects, impaired immunity, endocrine disruption and other ailments.

 

Plastic costs billions to abate.

 

Everything suffers: tourism, recreation, business, the health of humans,

animals, fish and birds—because of plastic pollution. The financial damage continuously being inflicted is inestimable.

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Balancing my chakras 06/15/19

 

 

I am working on balancing my chakras especially my ajna (or brow) chakra​.​​ ​Apparently ​I need to take in more supplements and foods that help in keeping the pineal gland healthy​ and my regular distribution of melatonin is disrupted​ as​ it results in depression, mood swings, and seasonal disorders. The pineal gland is also responsible for metabolizing other neurochemicals, such as DMT and pinoline, which coordinate emotional and physical processes on a cellular level.​ ​​I suppose I need some extra serotonin or DMT as well (like I can get that legally)...

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Layla/Lilith and baby's 02/07/2019

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As you know Layla or Lilith has been constantly considered evil BUT everything has evil intentions and nothing is completely evil. They mostly blame her for killing baby's but really she doesn't kill them she is the one who gives them the Vampyre spirit so they become one of us (a Vampyre). That is how all human Vampyres are created by her by being born as Vampyre Kin - a human with a Vampyre Spirit or soul...

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2018

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Wiccans and Gods 10/07/2018 

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For a while I have been against Wiccan beliefs but it is only certain things now as some of there beliefs are pretty close to Christianity. I have been reading some of there books as I am a theologian and one thing that is very close to what I believe is the pursuit of Spiritual Evolution and divinity to become gods...

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2017

 

 

The Christian God and Allah 10/28/2017 

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I read an Interesting post on Allah being a moon god but I believe the that Allah and the christian god are one in the same and the God who created people but he didn't create everything just people. I believe in many Gods and Goddesses that are written about and they created everything else...

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http://vampyrian.spruz.com/pt/The-Christian-God-and-allah/blog.htm

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